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Friday Funnies 4-Apr-2009 At 1:47:45 PM pmonks

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Little Johnnie came into school (late as usual) just as Miss was telling the kids the word of the day. "Children, the word of the day is 'contagious' - please look it up in your dictionaries and then write a sentence or two that uses it." The kids all put their heads down and after a couple of minutes Miss says "Ok who is ready to share their sentence with the class?"

"ME!! ME!!" shouts Little Johnnie from the back of the classroom. Not quite sure how he could get into trouble with this task, but wary anyway, Miss picks Suzie. "Suzie, what is your sentence?" "Miss, my sentence is: 'My sister came home from school with a sniffle, and the next morning everyone in the family had a cold - that's because colds are contagious.'" replied Suzie.

"Very good Suzie! That's a great use of the word 'contagious'! Does anyone else have a sentence they'd like to share?"

"MISS!! ME!! MISS PICK ME!!!" shouts Little Johnnie from up the back. Intrigued, but still cautious Miss picks Wayne. "Wayne, the class would love to hear your sentence." "My Uncle has bad allergies, but he says not to worry since allergies aren't contagious." said Wayne.

"Great sentence Wayne! Does anyone else have a sentence they'd like read?"

"MISS MISS!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!! PICK ME!!" shouts Little Johnnie from the back row. With curiosity overtaking her caution, Miss gives in. "Alright Little Johnnie, please stand up and tell us how you've used the word 'contagious'."

"Well me and me dad were on our way to school this morning, when we saw this HUGE farkin' accident between a milk truck and a car! There was sh1t everywhere - broken glass here, milk splattered over there, twisted metal all over the place. And as we drove past we saw a street sweeper coming towards us, and me dad turns to me and says 'you know what Little Johnnie? It's going to take that poor contagious to clean that up!'"