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Chockstone Forum - General Discussion

General Climbing Discussion

Topic Date User
Friday Funnies 6-Mar-2009 At 11:41:19 AM MrsM10iswhereitsat.
Message
Hello again this beautiful Friday my Chockerstone lovelies.
Derek my M10 love has been telling me about all the wonderful posts that have happened this week and in his inimitable style reckons a couple of them reminded him of some humorous moments that he thinks worth sharing with you all.


On 3/03/2009 on Roped Soloing Techniques thread Mr fish boy wrote:
>...don't forget, YOU'RE GONNA DIE!!!!!!



An old tradster takes a visibly shaken top-roper to visit a Doctor after his first multipitch climb. The top-roper is getting dressed in another room after being examined, and the tradster asks the Doc if his friend is going to be alright.

The Doctor replies, “Your mate is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don’t do the following he will surely die. Each morning ensure he eats a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make sure he has a nutritious meal, and for dinner he needs an especially nice meal. No belay duty. No sandbagging. Oh yes, hard for a top-roper I know, but try to ensure he gets sex at least once a week. Do this for the next year and he will regain his health completely.”

The top-roper emerges from the other room and soon afterwards, as they leave the surgery, asks the tradster what the Doc said.

The tradster replies; “YOU'RE GONNA DIE!!!!!!”







On 2/03/2009 Mr wallwombat wrote on Mr Josh Caples thread about selling bigbros at parties:
>I reckon they'd notice if they thought they were going to get a Big Bro
>and ended up with a #1Pecker instead.


Yoo hoo, young Mr Josh Caple, (waving at you madly), which State in Australia do you find has the most parties worth attending? I gather they must not be too good otherwise you would not be going overseas so far away from home. Or is there another reason?





A Mexican woodpecker and a Canadian woodpecker were in Mexico
arguing about which place had the toughest trees. The Mexican woodpecker
claimed Mexico had a tree that no woodpecker could peck. The Canadian
woodpecker accepted his challenge and promptly pecked a hole in the tree
with no problem.

The Mexican woodpecker was amazed. The Canadian woodpecker then challenged
the Mexican woodpecker to peck a tree in Canada that was absolutely
'impeckable' (a term frequently used by woodpeckers ).

The Mexican woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it and
accepted the challenge.

The two flew to Canada where the Mexican woodpecker successfully pecked
the so-called 'impeckable' tree almost without breaking a sweat. Both
woodpeckers were now terribly confused. How is it that the Canadian
woodpecker was able to peck the Mexican tree, and the Mexican woodpecker
was able to peck the Canadian tree, yet neither was able to peck the
tree in their own country?

After much woodpecker wondering, they both came to the same conclusion:

Apparently, your pecker gets harder when you're away from home.


There are 1236 replies to this topic.

 

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