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Friday Funnies 20-Feb-2009 At 4:34:46 PM MrsM10iswhereitsat.

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I see that you are a practical sort of person Mr ajfclark.
Have you ever considered what it is like to become elderly?
Derek my M10 love says he is not going to get old, as the booze will preserve him long before that. I am not so sure, and found these funnies for him to think about. Maybe you will enjoy them too?

SUPERSEX

A little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing home. As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and say 'Supersex..."
She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair, flipping her gown at him she said, 'Supersex.'

He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, 'I'll take the soup.'

ROMANCE

An older couple were lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to talk. She said: 'You used to hold my hand when we were courting.' Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep. A few moments later she said: 'Then you used to kiss me.' Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.
Thirty seconds later she said: 'Then you used to bite my Neck.' Angrily, he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed. 'Where are you going' she asked.
'To get my teeth!'

DOWN AT THE RETIREMENT CENTER

80-year old Bessie bursts into the rec room at the retirement home. She holds her clenched fist in the air and announces, 'Anyone who can guess what's in my hand can have sex with me tonight!!' An elderly gentleman in the rear shouts out, 'An elephant' Bessie thinks a minute and says, 'Close enough.'

I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!'

Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, 'Windy, isn't it' 'No,' the second man replied, 'it's Thursday.' And the third man chimed in, 'So am I. Let's have a beer.'

FAMILY

Three sisters ages 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together. One night the 96 year old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, 'Was I getting in or out of the bath' The 94 year old yells back, 'I don't know. I'll come up and see.' She starts up the stairs and pauses 'Was I going up the stairs or down' The 92 year old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, 'I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood.' She then yells, 'I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door.'