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Chockstone Forum - General Discussion

General Climbing Discussion

 Page 3 of 3. Messages 1 to 20 | 21 to 40 | 41 to 58
Author
Seriously, this site ... !

MisterGribble
20-Aug-2016
8:47:40 PM
On 20/08/2016 Stugang wrote:
>I love the thread where Eduardo inadvertently fessed up to having intimate
>relations with microwaved haggis on a regular basis.

I have pictures.......

Eduardo Slabofvic
21-Aug-2016
10:54:28 PM
On 20/08/2016 MisterGribble wrote:
>On 20/08/2016 Stugang wrote:
>>I love the thread where Eduardo inadvertently fessed up to having intimate
>>relations with microwaved haggis on a regular basis.
>
>I have pictures.......

I have scars

Duang Daunk
22-Aug-2016
11:37:31 AM
On 21/08/2016 Eduardo Slabofvic wrote:
>On 20/08/2016 MisterGribble wrote:
>>On 20/08/2016 Stugang wrote:
>>>I love the thread where Eduardo inadvertently fessed up to having intimate
>>>relations with microwaved haggis on a regular basis.
>>
>>I have pictures.......
>
>I have scars

Bro eduardo, your stipend has just been reduced for making another bum joke.
- last time I subcontract out. Final payment will be withheld.
Notime to climb
22-Aug-2016
7:45:08 PM
Clinton's Tyrolean adventures, Chockstone gold

IdratherbeclimbingM9
23-Aug-2016
11:44:14 AM
On 22/08/2016 Notime to climb wrote:
>Clinton's Tyrolean adventures, Chockstone gold

More links to background threads at the time, plus follow-on posts.


Is Cicada a troll?

Another Boring Straddie TR

TR - straddie 1

http://queenslandclimbing.yuku.com/topic/6251/Clinton-and-his-Tyrolean-Traverse-on-Straddy-#.V7uvxTWJiSo

http://queenslandclimbing.yuku.com/topic/6253/Simey-gets-rescued#.V7uv8jWJiSo


Hmm.
I couldn't track down (a link to) Making Dreams Come True, a video as entered into Goatfest 2013, produced by simey... ~> So he shall have to post that link.





PS: And a random one for AP that I tripped over ...
Punks in the Gym


Andy P
24-Aug-2016
12:09:46 AM
>PS: And a random one for AP that I tripped over ...
> Punks in the Gym
>
>
Why, thats most kind of you M9 - yer know, reminding me why I quit climbing, thanks!
That 'Smitten' video, the first part anyway, just look at the bloke's face (coz he's not centre of attention) and the attractive lady's throwing everything at it. How rude he appears, and disparaging. A face (and no idea who is is - might be a top bloke) but a face that needed a damn good slap if you ask me. Hows about actually supporting your partner ,,, ?
Taxi!











hero
31-Aug-2016
8:42:46 PM
Another one for you Andy. From one of the early THE's ARE YOU A WoNKER?
by Angel Black.

Yes, it is dated but I couldn't be bothered (craup - I said bothered) to update it.

In the spirit of `Cleo', `Cosmopolitan' and `Climbing' this month `THE' brings you its own pop psychology, self assessment, multiple choice quiz.

Are you a wonker? A question many a climber has to consider. And most have to consider the answer is yes. Work through these twenty questions and at the end, calculate your score. This will tell you if you are a w0nker, and how much of one you are.

QUESTIONS:

1.What is the hardest route in the world?
a: Action Directe
b: Grey Area
c: Your new buumstart classic in the Grampians.
d: Agamemnon

2.What is the best cliff in the world?
a: Buoux
b: Arapiles
c: El Cap
d: Cheesedale

3.How often do you train?
a: Every day, all day.
b: Every second day.
c: When you can.
d: Never.

4.What sort of training do you do most?
a: Nautilus
b: Bouldering/buildering
c: Edge boards
d: Standing in front of the mirror, pursing your lips, trying to look like Garth.

5.How often do you go climbing?
Same choice for answer as question 3.

6. What do you wear?
a: Expensive sponsor climbing pants
b: shorts and a t-shirt.
c: anything.
d: a g-string, 15+ and a smile.

7. Who is your hero?
a: HB
b: Ralph
d: Fred Nicole
e: Nyrie

8. What is the National Hotel's publican's name?
a: Doug
b: Trev
c: Wendy
d: Where is the National Hotel?

9. Which sort of protection do you like and trust most?
a: Friends
b: a crash mat
c: bolts
d: condoms

10. What the hardest climb you've done?
a: 10
b: 20
c: 30
d: V10

10a. I mean lead, red point?
a: 5
b: 15
c: 25
d: V5

11. A women's place in climbing is...?
a: In my tent.
b: Sitting around belaying and cooking.
c: Anywhere they want to be.
d: spotting me

12. Which of the following statements best sums up your attitudes to sport climbing?
a: It said in `Rock' that it was an acceptable practice now.
b: I do it so I can get better and climb harder.
c: I do it because if I get up a 25 with all the gear clipped I can say I climb harder.
d: What's sport climbing?

13. How many days did Andy Pollitt spend on `Punks' and why?
a: More than 10
b: More than 20
c: More than Kim spent on Masada
d: Who is Andy Pollitt?

14. You read the word f>ck in a magazine. You...?
a: Sack the editor.
b: Rant and rave, refuse to buy the magazine anymore, and harangue people about how it's OK to use the word when climbing but it shouldn't be in a climbing magazine where children can read it.
c: Read the article for its content and then make a critical appraisal of it regardless of the medium of expression it chose.
d: wet yourself.

15. You like to boulder because ….
a: It's cool man
b: It makes you stronger for climbing
c: You're a wimp
d: Gear confuses you.

16. I like to read THE because...?
a: of the articles.
b: to see who's doing what to whom with what and why in Natimuk.
c: of the witty and erudite articles, the reams of funny cartoons, the superb photographs and the informed editorials.
d: I don't actually like to read THE at all.

17. I drive a ...?
a: 4x4
b: red celica
c: laser
d: lot when I'm drunk.

18. I'm looking forward to watching climbing on TV from the olympics because...?
a: I've always wanted to see myself on TV.
b: I want to catch up on the lastest in climbing fashion.
c: I like watching those rippling bodies move over rock, sorry plastic.
d: I think Bobbi's a spunk

19. How far below your waist should a runner ever get?
a: 1m
b: 5m
c: 10m ( 25 on slabs)
d: What do you mean below your waist?

20. How do you make a bloody Mary?
a: Climb `Angels' and pour Vodka on your arms.
b: Juice some Red points.
c: Forget to put your lycras in colour fast.
d: Move her mat.

hero
31-Aug-2016
8:44:03 PM
And the answers:

SCORE>
1. a. Possibly correct, 5 points for knowing it b. 5 for thinking it c. Total wonker, 10 points d. possibly correct, 0.
2. Any answer to this question gets you 5 points. Buoux 10.
3.a. You may not be a w0nker but are probably an idiot, 5
b.Yes, you've got to give them little muscles a rest occasionally, 5. c. This is an all purpose answer, 0 d. W0nker, 10.
4. All answers 5 except for d which is 20 points.
5. Same answers as question 3 also.
6. a.5 b.5 c.5 for being unfashionable d. Things that make you go hmmm, 5.
7.a. 5 for having a hero at all b.10 c. 5 for being unfashionable d. 5 if you're male, for picking the non sexist answer.
8.a.0 b.5 for knowing it c. for making it up. don't you hate people who think they can just use luck to get through multiple choice. d. w0nker, 10 (but only if you've climbed at Arapiles, otherwise 0.
9.a.5 b.10 c.5 d. the obvious choice, but the question was trust, not use.
10.Score same as answer. Same with 10a.
11. a and b. Ouch 20 points.
12. a.10 b.5 c.10 d. Nice try, 5 for not knowing. You must be aware of thing that threaten the purity of our activity.
13. Exactly, all answers except c. correct.
14. a.10 b.15 c.5 for being a smart arze d. 5 for being a wimp.
15. Possibly all answers are right but the only scores are 5 points for c. for knowing and 10 points for d. for being a sycophant.
16. d. is the correct answer. The others all score 10 points.
17. All are w0nkers and get 5 points except for d. You're not a w0nker, you're a bloody idiot.
18.Score 10 all questions.
19. d. again is the only correct answer. Score 5 points on others for not owning up to believing d.
20.5 points for a. for knowing what `Angels' is. If you've done it give yourself another 10 points.

ASSESSMENT>

Less than 50. You are not a w0nker. In fact you are probably a lot like me. Which is nice, because not many people do like me. They usually think I'm a w0nker, but now I can prove, with this test that I am not. They are.

50-110. OK, so you're not so much of a w0nker as an insipid, sycophantic, meretricious wimp. You'd like to train harder, wear bright lycra, tell people to stop calling you by your nickname, drive faster, in a celica, and all in all be a w0nker, but you don't have the spine or bank book for it. You're destined to spend all your time at Arapiles doing good routes you've done before. Boring.

110-220. Whoah Nelly. Do people make life saver motions when you walk past. Do they put on their sunglasses to shield their eyes from the glare from your clothes and the sunshine streaming from your...Ask your friends for their honest opinion off you. Be prepared to be horrified. You probably are a member of the VCC to boot. Face it sunshine, you are a w0nker!

Above 220. Kill yourself now!




Andy P
1-Sep-2016
1:19:05 PM
Ha!, bl**dy brill that hero, thanks - never seen it before.
Very witty indeed and very entertaing. Haven't smiled so much in ages.
Cheers,
AP.
BA
1-Sep-2016
7:40:55 PM
Ahh, the good old days when Dulux/Angel/Hero was the reason you went climbing ... it was fun. You had no idea who was going to get slagged off or who was going to get praised. But at least you knew who was up who and with what. Come back Greg, all is forgiven.

MisterGribble
1-Sep-2016
8:27:51 PM
On 1/09/2016 BA wrote:
>. Come back Greg, all is forgiven.

I feel a plebicite coming on ....
Andy P
1-Sep-2016
9:53:52 PM
On 1/09/2016 MisterGribble wrote:
>I feel a plebicite coming on ....

B*ggers of things aren't they? But there's a cream you can get nowadays.
Get well soon.
martym
1-Sep-2016
11:01:39 PM
7. Who is your hero?
a: HB
b: Ralph
d: Fred Nicole
e: Nyrie

I vote e: Nyrie
But what happened to C?

ajfclark
2-Sep-2016
7:27:40 AM
Looking at the scoring:

> 7.a. 5 for having a hero at all b.10 c. 5 for being unfashionable d. 5 if you're male, for picking the non sexist answer.

There's only supposed to be A, B, C, D.
Jayford4321
2-Sep-2016
5:29:29 PM
On 2/09/2016 ajfclark wrote:
>Looking at the scoring:
>
eero sed
>I couldn't be bothered (craup - I said bothered) to update it.

presumably this includes typos.
Ur good at stating tha obvious clarky. i reckon U'd be a shoe in at the next dubl disillusioned election.

Eduardo Slabofvic
2-Sep-2016
7:19:23 PM
On 1/09/2016 Andy P wrote:
>
>Get well soon.

Yuk yuk yuk
stugang
2-Sep-2016
10:03:13 PM
The trouble with chocky is all the narcissists have fkd off to Facebook where they can preselect the thumbs they want shoved up their arse.

White Trash
2-Sep-2016
10:11:10 PM
On 2/09/2016 Jayford4321 wrote:
>The trouble with chocky is all the narcissists have fkd off to Facebook
>where they can preselect the thumbs they want shoved up their arse.
>
Was that an answer to
>What happened to The Climbing'? Let alone the S&D 'n R&R?
If so, then you should post a liven up to stugangs wierd shit abseil thread, as he seems to have caught the AndyP glums lately..
but mebe it understandable as absquealing will do that to ya.

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There are 58 messages in this topic.

 

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