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Araps round up - (Missing Link overrated?) 26-Mar-2007 At 2:25:27 PM skink

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A few Araps trips back, my climbing partner announced that my mission for the trip was Kachoong.

Dave had climbed it earlier with someone else, and declared that even if I felt that 18 was my onsight limit on trad, Kachoong was within my ability cos it was kind of a one move wonder, and that with my power to weight ratio, I would have no problem jugging across the roof and pulling thru the lip to glory.
Now this power to weight ratio comment stems not from my Herculean strength and prowess thru roofs, but rather that I am short and scrawny. Also Dave onsights 25, so I was less than convinced.

However, Dave kept talking like it was a given that I was going to climb it on this trip, and so it was that I found myself standing on the starting ledge looking up at the climb with a mixture of disappointment, excitement and fear.

Disappointment that the line didn't really live up to the hype - you start halfway up the cliff, the inspiring view to Mitre Lake has this silly ball in it and well it's not exactly a long climb if it's all over once you pull the lip.

Excitement - well it was going to be my first 21 on trad, hardly a day had passed in the previous week without my attention being drawn to the FACT that I was going to climb IT on this trip and finally, it was Kachoong, three stars, THE Arapiles climb, even if it wasn't as I had imagined

Fear - fear of failure...21, TWENTY-ONE, big roof, BIG ROOF, blank looking start, Rob fell off following Dave and he onsights 21s (his excuse was his finger got caught in the flake and he got pumped out trying to get it out).
Fear of blowing the onsight, you only get one chance and I think I am trying to soon.
Fear of getting hurt... "don't get your heels in to deep or you'll break an ankle if you come off, oh, and try and get a few good cams as far out along the flakes before you head out, don't wanna swing in and splat aginst the wall now do we" - thanks for the advice Dave, this is really helping...

So I am off, and immediately slow down to a crawl working my way up the thin, sparse wall... a while later I get to the mini stance under the roof, plug in an obscene amount of gear and then get stuck there with ledge syndrome, second guessing my placements, dicking around with sling lengths trying to trade off rope drag against air time and crash-test-dummying into the wall below... Yells of encouragement from the photographers ledge and below eventually start becoming repetitive and irritating... the inevitable cannot be pushed aside any longer... a quick hyperventilate and I'm off...

My world turns upside down and immediately I feel out of control... this is so not natural to me, climbing horizontally... the heel hooks feel styly, and the holds are good, but I can feel the pump coming galloping in with every heartbeat... hurry hurry, I shuffle along the flakes... the lip comes up, I grope around blindly above it for the jugs... nothing... need to shuffle more... things are starting to throb... grope grope, something for the left hand, not a jug, but time is running out, heel hooks are sketching, got my head round the lip, can't see anything big, need a jug... right hand snatches, catches... feet cut loose... can't see to put them back on... pull up... pull upppppp...... shouts from above and below are deafened by the roar of blood in my ears...

can't...

disappointment and fear mingle as I plummet then swing wildly, missing the wall but not by much... all is quiet from below and the photographers ledge as I have my moment of despair. Then the optimistic banter starts up again...'bad luck... you were nearly there... I think you were too far left... I think the jugs are more to the right... you'll get it this time..'

I find myself at the wretched procrastination mini-stance again, this time with no excuses for hanging around, except maybe to try and get rid of the brutal pump that is making me feel like vomiting. After a brief shake out, I'm off again, not motivated by enthusiasm, but rather I just want to get out of here, back to where gravity isn't such an awful thing, shuffle, less style this time, but with more purpose... the lip comes up at about the same time as the pump starts getting intolerable again. This time no messing about, all the way to the lip, reach through with the right this time, latch the jug (thank god), keep the feet on, twist through to get the left hand to a good hold, got it,, getting tired getting tired... can't do this again, WON'T do this again... arms strain into lockoff, feet are off, one up over the lip, get it on something, get it on something, got it, body vibrates from the tension as I rock over, strain eases as weight gets on to the feet , more big(ish) handholds, big enough for my cramping hands to manage, relief starts flooding in, tho keep the focus, get some gear in, still some moves to go, look easy though...

I flop onto the ledge, spent, left bicep in spasm, nausea washing in and out as I crawl over and clip in to the rap anchor. "Safe", i yell down, trying to sound cool, relaxed, but the break in my voice gives it away. The hot sun and nausea combine to make belaying Dave up the last thing I want to be doing now... I want water, sugar, shade, drugs...

I tie overhand knots in the rope as I belay Dave up, concerned I won't have the strength to lock off the atc if he falls, my focus is on keeping my shit together...

Dave gets up no hassles, congratulates me - but it all sounds hollow to me - blew the onsight, grovelled up the second time, I feel beaten, more luck than good judgement.

While Dave goes off and onsights his next project, I hit the ibuprofen, water and muesli bars, take some photos, watch another party climb Kachoong, the leader styles (to my disappointment), but at least the second has a bit of an epic and takes some air - I know it shouldn't make me feel better about things, but somehow it does...

Eventually after a couple of hours reality is all back in alignment, so I blew the onsight, so what, at least I didn't give up (couldn't give up says a small voice in the back of my mind, shut up). At least I can say I climbed Kachoong, that awesome looking climb on the back cover of the book.... sort of climbed, not styled, but got up, yeah, I can say "I got up that"...

And next time I go on it, I'll have done some more horizontal climbing at the gym, I'll be ready, fitter, faster, I'll go right, I'll style.... It'll feel like 18...