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Chockstone Forum - Crag & Route Beta

Crag & Route Beta

 Page 2 of 7. Messages 1 to 20 | 21 to 40 | 41 to 60 | 61 to 80 | 81 to 100 | 101 to 120 | 121 to 138
Area Location Sub Location Crag Links
All NSW (General) (General) (General)  

Author
new nowra guide badly produced
rockotter
26/05/2011
5:40:39 PM
The old guide was out of print for quite a while nobody but Rod got in there. The new guide is a little idiosyncratic but thats the way it is. Haven't heard much whinging about the liberties and omissions of the Arapiles guide, especially the history section. I say put up or shut up, does everything has to be a modern sanitised reproduction of what everybody else is doing I think not!
crazyjohn
26/05/2011
5:56:30 PM
I totally agree. That is why I will be producing my own guide book while visiting Nowra. I will do a bit of name changing as well. Murdoch the horse f---er is much too tame. How About Horse f---er the Murdoch Raper? And I can do some creative new link ups... I bet I could triple the routes by climbing horizontally. Who doesnt like traverses? I can almost smell the $$$ And for photos Ill just put full on XXX porno shots inside. Or just glue some hand drawn topos inside of an issue of "all-anal volume IV"? This would be totally family oriented when mommy can explain the names of the route to junior with the help of the included visuals. Yeah! What a crap guide book! Porn is the future of climbing. They had it right in the 80's.

nmonteith
26/05/2011
6:09:41 PM
On 26/05/2011 rockotter wrote:
>The new guide is a little idiosyncratic but thats the way it is.

Idiosyncratic is a hand-drawn topo on a photocopied bit of paper passed around the campfire. This Nowra guide is hundreds of pages, full color, big print run production aimed towards a large mainstream climbing scene. Unfortunately the design really lets it down when compared to other guides on the market. The Sydney bouldering guide is a good example of something that feels 'underground' but is still designed to some sort of professional standards (yes, design is a profession.)
Duncan
26/05/2011
6:55:38 PM
On 26/05/2011 rockotter wrote:
> does everything has to be a modern sanitised reproduction of what everybody else is doing
>I think not!

I dunno, new family-friendly route names sounds pretty sanitised to me. Mark Twight once lamented that "Climbing used to be counter-cultural" - seems this is another nail in that coffin.

nmonteith
26/05/2011
7:06:12 PM
I actually like most of the photos in the new guide. Most were ones i had never seen before which is always good. Good range of grades and locations, including the unusual. As anyone who has ever tried to photograph at Nowra can attest - it's a hard place to take a decent photo!

IdratherbeclimbingM9
26/05/2011
7:53:47 PM
So what are Nowra climbers looking for? A guide they can take to the cliff and not worry if it gets ruined in the process, or a coffee table showpiece?
Linze
26/05/2011
7:57:39 PM
On 26/05/2011 nmonteith wrote:
> As anyone who has ever tried to photograph at Nowra
>can attest - it's a hard place to take a decent photo!

should be able to get good pics at south central now that the droopy blue stalagtites that had been creativly fashioned of melted milk crate are gone... i miss those!
daave
27/05/2011
7:32:53 AM
On 26/05/2011 crazyjohn wrote:
>I totally agree. That is why I will be producing my own guide book while
>visiting Nowra. I will do a bit of name changing as well. Murdoch the horse
>f---er is much too tame. How About Horse f---er the Murdoch Raper? And
>I can do some creative new link ups... I bet I could triple the routes
>by climbing horizontally. Who doesnt like traverses? I can almost smell
>the $$$ And for photos Ill just put full on XXX porno shots inside. Or
>just glue some hand drawn topos inside of an issue of "all-anal volume
>IV"? This would be totally family oriented when mommy can explain the names
>of the route to junior with the help of the included visuals. Yeah! What
>a crap guide book! Porn is the future of climbing. They had it right in
>the 80's.

CJ, Where can I buy one of these new porn-infused guide books?


Big G
27/05/2011
8:58:37 AM
shame about the names perhaps a few could have been reduced to initials or a few cunningly placed asterisks applied. I still fondly recall being asked by a german climber "Wo ist der depleted gonad circumference?" (apply your own ludicrous smei-camp german accent) - gold!
widewetandslippery
27/05/2011
9:29:35 AM
On 26/05/2011 tnd wrote:
>On 26/05/2011 Wendy wrote:
>>...the gutter
>>porn names were for the most part not even clever or amusing.
>
>Classics like "Blue Veined Custard Chucker" and "Receiver of Swollen Goods"
>always amused me. Not so much the unimaginative "Blowjob Queens from Hell"
>and "Motorcycle Sluts in Heat". Have they all been cleaned up?
>
>Even "Pale Yellow Underwear" (courtesy of a Chocktoner if my memory serves
>me correctly) raises a smirk.

Pale yellow underwear is what Rosa wears in a Kurt Schwitters poem about Rosa and Fredricks love as they succumb to poverty and TB.

life is lust, life is wild desire, Rosa wears pale yellow underwear.
widewetandslippery
27/05/2011
9:52:39 AM
On 26/05/2011 crazyjohn wrote:
>I totally agree. That is why I will be producing my own guide book while
>visiting Nowra. I will do a bit of name changing as well. Murdoch the horse
>f---er is much too tame. How About Horse f---er the Murdoch Raper? And
>I can do some creative new link ups... I bet I could triple the routes
>by climbing horizontally. Who doesnt like traverses? I can almost smell
>the $$$ And for photos Ill just put full on XXX porno shots inside. Or
>just glue some hand drawn topos inside of an issue of "all-anal volume
>IV"? This would be totally family oriented when mommy can explain the names
>of the route to junior with the help of the included visuals. Yeah! What
>a crap guide book! Porn is the future of climbing. They had it right in
>the 80's.

I'm with you CJ. The guide would be much better if there were pictures of young women engaged in auto erotic anal fisting where you see some knuckles showing out the mouth than portraits of ugly men looking dumb.
Wendy
27/05/2011
9:54:26 AM
i don't really think depleted gonad circumference and pale yellow underwear were problematic. I don't even have an issue with random swearing such as in EMSBOSMF. But you are welcome to try and convince me of some good reasons for accepting Evil bum fck babe or lesbian vibrator bitches as reasonable route names. i wouldn't miss the very highschool boy like cum and bum jokes either.
widewetandslippery
27/05/2011
10:06:38 AM
Evil Bum f--- Babe was in reference to Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct.
widewetandslippery
27/05/2011
10:09:52 AM
On 27/05/2011 Wendy wrote:
i wouldn't miss the very highschool boy like cum
>and bum jokes either.

They generally came from high school like boys.
Wendy
27/05/2011
11:03:30 AM
On 27/05/2011 widewetandslippery wrote:
>Evil Bum f--- Babe was in reference to Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct.

If it had been about flashing twats or boiling bunnies, someone might pick that. Otherwise, I still think it's a crap name.

rodw
27/05/2011
11:27:46 AM
There was no boiling bunnines in Basic Instinct was there? wasn't that Fatal Attraction?

ajfclark
27/05/2011
11:37:32 AM
Yup: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yht6nbQ_xNA

tnd
27/05/2011
11:46:01 AM
On 27/05/2011 Wendy wrote:
>i don't really think depleted gonad circumference and pale yellow underwear
>were problematic. I don't even have an issue with random swearing such
>as in EMSBOSMF. But you are welcome to try and convince me of some good
>reasons for accepting Evil bum fck babe or lesbian vibrator bitches as
>reasonable route names. i wouldn't miss the very highschool boy like cum
>and bum jokes either.

What about "Cheesy Noblicker" Wendy? I mean, hey, that's all class.

and what's with the sentences without an initial capital. you should know better! :-)

tnd
27/05/2011
11:47:27 AM
On 27/05/2011 widewetandslippery wrote:
>...Pale yellow underwear is what Rosa wears in a Kurt Schwitters poem about
>Rosa and Fredricks love as they succumb to poverty and TB.
>
>life is lust, life is wild desire, Rosa wears pale yellow underwear.

You're waxing lyrical there WWS. I have to admit I thought it referred to days old skiddies with pee stains.
widewetandslippery
27/05/2011
12:11:49 PM
tnd it does, just by those who have no choice

 Page 2 of 7. Messages 1 to 20 | 21 to 40 | 41 to 60 | 61 to 80 | 81 to 100 | 101 to 120 | 121 to 138
There are 138 messages in this topic.

 

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