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Chockstone Forum - General Discussion

General Climbing Discussion

 Page 1 of 4. Messages 1 to 20 | 21 to 40 | 41 to 60 | 61 to 76
Author
Dead Poets Society (formerly Poetry Corner)

LittleMac
28-Mar-2005
7:41:06 PM
On 22/03/2005 Romfrantic wrote:
>...this dead poets society gathering is hilarious (lol).
>ok, carry on....

In the spirit of inspiration and hilarity, at last a place for all those creative minds (and somewhat warped minds) to share their genius with the world. To get those creative juices flowing I have transferred a few existing gems.

Enjoy.

The first poem is an open project which can be addded to at any time.

As Romfrantic said

>ok, carry on....

LittleMac
28-Mar-2005
7:42:30 PM
Little Mac
He will post-back
To remind us of his greatness...

It could be said
His posts were read
Into the nights long lateness ...

And then there was hex
who liked pistols and sex
and all of his posts they were aimless

And in Damos head,
Many posts too, he fledged
But like Ralston was regarded as 'armless

M8 took a long look
Then proceeded to use a bat hook
And climbed where before it was climbless

Honest Hexy !!! HONEST !!! --- god-damn
Who would buy a used cam from this man?
And the Death-Star games room agenda was then marbles(s)

TastyBigMac blew the dust off his nuts
And Dr Simey said enough of that smut
And after much trauma, we did all stress less....

The cauldron it simmered
The black art of preclipping
As stirring, Hexy said “Your all heartless!”

"PRECLIPPING!!" the act of the devil
But I don't want to die he did snivel
And we sat back thought check out that rack and then replied, "shameless"

"We’ll make it a date so don’t turn up late!"
Said Onsight slopping beer all over the red dress
Hexie in anguish she sighed, “Honestly! (& cried)!! I’m going outside,
where it smells less”

Mr Monteith he did take a whipper
And he caught it on, film what a ripper
Gee golly gosh that did hurt and and i've probably learnt, that it would
help much more if I sweat less

Romfrantic free flying spirit
Did laugh out loud for a minute,
Then scraped it together for a Maoist’s misty mountain trip, receiptless!

WM observed quietly
When information requests came nightly,
Ahem, there’s another, (ahem), w(m)ebsite … for info regardless!

From Moderation Peak on high Dalai he spied
Too many spam things getting time online,
So gentle advice he imbued and when they refused, he made sure their efforts
were rewardless.

Said simey, "A piton (s) would help here"
But others said "NO, it's got history"
Despite this and that you can't hide the fact, the crack is much safer
regardless.

The Ghetto was Shaggy's fine home
A table his surfboard did make.
Till one drunken night, the board caught alight, and the crowd cheered,
all remorseless

rhinckle he roamed, & near Wabbit Wocks he did zone
Putting up lines in abundance to play on,
Till the quandary came up are they climbs or they not?, for on boulders
you can climb on them gearless.

gfdonc is his name and climbings the game
Of which there isn’t much out there he’s ‘fraid of,
FA’s are the fame but its children who came, to keep his climbing time
peerless.

And when Mike retired in the year of our Lord
Two Thousand, no hundred and Eighty Four
The Chockstone site continued to grow on*(*Fascinating the throng), with
its timeless & very impressive deathlessness.

Dear Hex it was said, I have lost my head
Where once I was strong, I now can't hang on
So keep on going up, keep climbing don't stop, and the result will be
lackless

Dried Rat once said To Balls Pyramid or Bust
But S.Carter and crew, said this you musn't do
So they''ll hire a yacht and climb up to the top, let's pray that the
Phasmids aren't homeless.

Oweng expatriated to Tassie not content with Arapiles
& to where retreating from big climbs can be a fashion,
Though a thumb bending South gave rise to the thought, that bouldering
sans a mat could be pointless.

Ed Frilly lurked up with anonanimity in his cup,
and took issue with the ethics of cut ‘n’ pasting,
Traditionalist he is, so ‘outings’ not in!, therefore most on this site
remain clueless.

Climbau harks from up border way and loves a good self portrait,
Evolvings the game, within climbing moments the same,
So he manages to get up many an offwidth even bigbro-less!

Phil Box he cruised off on a big ship which had a knock,
in its gearbox or somewhere disastrous,
He maintained his good humour and put paid to the rumours, that climbers
can’t fix things rewardless.

BA scribe of history extraordinaire many a fact with us all did share,
And well respected by us are his thoughts on all matters,
It isn’t a joke when grading system changes are proposed; so politely
he said “ Don’t be ruthless”.

A is for Aiders and M for mechanics
A all the way, enough of the romantics
It's a matter of grading, which is sometimes most draining, but alas for
the M it is toothless

Hocking and Stone, pioneers of their day
Up the Bard they did wander, without much delay
Without protection or general direction, classics they sang and classic
they climbed and of all this we are doubtless

Gutter rat of the Gums, oh indeed
But young sabu, he will succeed
Piece by piece builds his rack, not a girlfriend he lacks, and his drive for both smut and the top they are boundless

--------------> Next

LittleMac
28-Mar-2005
7:43:52 PM
Autumn Leaves

-- by Damian Conway

And then she was gone.

In an instant,
Wheeling through the emptiness alone
Where once our thoughts had winged together
Like echoes of laughter.
Silent as a tear down that granite face,
Fluttering like a torn dream,
Reaching out to me,
Reaching.
Soundlessly goodbye,
Soundlessly crumpling on the hard dead earth below.

Gone, as the silence roared about me,
Cooling, as I scrambed through that infinite descent,
Cold, as I reached down to brush the ants
From her lovely, shattered face,
Her lovely, empty eyes.

They buried her in white.
On a cold grey winter's morning.
As they bury each of us -
Alone.
As they'll bury me some day.
When I stop falling.

IdratherbeclimbingM9
29-Mar-2005
8:48:12 AM
Hex said 30/01/05 (on another thread; and the original cross-posting of this has been cleaned-up);
-----------------------------
>A STRANGE TOUCH

>Dalai & Kent, they are my mates...
>they make me quake & shiver !
>When suspended from a dodgy RURP
>they inspire like Stones Green Ginger Wine in me liver ...

>I'm swingin' high
>I'm swingin' low
>I'm dancin' in me etts !
>That skyhooks flexin' on that flake,
>in rythm to me pirouettes !

>Now, Kieran's seen me from above
>and he starts trundlin' quartzite boulders
>" Take that, ya friggin' manky HEX ---
>I'm sicko'ya cauldron scoulders !!! "

>With broken bones and bleedin' nipples
>I bong-on past the over-hanging fist flare
>Oh shit !, why me ??,it can't be true !!
>Damey's pouncin' from his cyber-lair !

>" You've had ya fun, you've stolen the show,
>and ya crampin' me on the stage !
>Itz time you vanished and let me be,
>the Chockstone-creative-sage !! "

>He cutz my ropes,
>he pops me pins
>and lets me fall into the abyssssss ...
>" seeya Hexy ! --- you won't be missed ! ",
>yells Damo or is it Kris ...

>I see the ground rise up at me
>with speed thatz from Warp 9 !!!
>It feels sooooo GOOD !!!
>it wakes me up !
>I'm being massaged by Josh in the Pines ...

>------------------------

LittleMac
29-Mar-2005
4:26:11 PM
Little Mac
He will post-back
To remind us of his greatness...

(snip, continued).

Gutter rat of the Gums, oh indeed
But young sabu, he will succeed
Piece by piece builds his rack, not a girlfriend he lacks, and his drive for both smut and the top they are boundless

Sabu did think that Steph was quite sexy
Till along came our very own Hexy
But have no fear, because it should be quite clear, that in this battle hexy is.....................hapless

steph
29-Mar-2005
4:43:42 PM
hold on before i take offence LittleMac... hehe nice rhyme tho.

Little Mac's a little chap
who posts more than he climbs
his mindless drivel makes the rest of us snivel
while insulting us with rhymes...

LittleMac
29-Mar-2005
4:56:20 PM
On 29/03/2005 steph wrote:
>hold on before i take offence LittleMac... hehe nice rhyme tho.
>
>Little Mac's a little chap
>who posts more than he climbs
>his mindless drivel makes the rest of us snivel
>while insulting us with rhymes...
>

Nice, very nice. A new poet is born, M8 and I need not be loners on this thread.

They're not meant to be insulting, just lighthearted.

And you are correct about posting more than I climb but don't worry soon enough I'll be back on the cliff and huddling with yourself, James and the other Gum Rats at Araps.

If only I could get out of this work, thing, maybe if I....................................

Oh and by the way it's whilst not while. Smile heaps, LittleMac (hehehe)

sabu
29-Mar-2005
9:12:17 PM
hexy has no chance.....! (take that in anyway u see fit!!!) i'll always be ther to create smut out of innocence for u Mac, dun hav to be loners!!

hehe work or school same thing really both hamper getting to araps and huddling with gutter rats!! always will be smiling when ur posting little one!! hehe

steph
30-Mar-2005
4:26:35 PM
>They're not meant to be insulting, just lighthearted.

yeah i figured but 'rhymes' rhymes with 'climbs' so it fitted... also u associated my boyfriend with hexy in a manner other than phatic so forgive me if i took offence too soon. nah i see the potential don't worry lol...

>And you are correct about posting more than I climb but don't worry soon
>enough I'll be back on the cliff and huddling with yourself, James and
>the other Gum Rats at Araps.

Gum Rat? Moi? OK yeah ur right and i always will be. but keep ur distance dude i huddle with noone except my sabu. hehe

LittleMac
30-Mar-2005
4:40:04 PM
On 30/03/2005 steph wrote:
>Gum Rat? Moi? OK yeah ur right and i always will be. but keep ur distance
>dude i huddle with noone except my sabu. hehe

Hexy is going to be so dissapointed, Oh well he'll just have to huddle with someone else (not me), I'm a Pines Rat anyway, can't beat that historical air. Guess I'll just have to huddle with a Pine Cone or something...............

Make sure to add some poetic gems to the thread.

sabu
30-Mar-2005
4:56:16 PM
G - Gutter dwellers
U - Under the line of smut
M - More than any Pine Rat

R - Ranting & Raving
A - All night long
T - Till the week is ova
S - Still not finished!

steph
30-Mar-2005
4:59:38 PM
here's an acrostic beauty for you littlemac...

Pansy
Irrational
Narcisistic
Egocentric

Retarded
Anal
Toilet dwellers.
Still more to come...

LittleMac
30-Mar-2005
5:01:10 PM
An Ode to Superglue

Superglue is strong
Superglue is golden
I use it on my fingers
I'd hate it to be stolen

It fixed my best mates finger
It fixed my brothers shoe
We always use it
Come on, why don't you.

sabu
30-Mar-2005
5:03:01 PM
hehehe more gems!!!!

LittleMac
30-Mar-2005
5:04:52 PM
The true GUM RATS

Grotesque
Unwashed
Manky

Rotten
Acrid
Tactless
Scum

They huddle in the dust and sand
They rarely wash at all
They leave a mess attract the birds
Gum Rats we are apalled

Gum and Pine Rats unite because if we can't love each other no one will (probably not even our mothers)

steph
30-Mar-2005
5:22:58 PM
Superglue is strong
Superglue is bold
Superglue stuck me to me
When I was 8 years old

It fixes dad's mechanics
It sticks well every time
But forgive me if I never let it
Aid me when I climb

LittleMac
30-Mar-2005
5:30:31 PM
Golden, simply golden

Steph, I think it's time that you added a gem to the ongoing poem (see top of thread). Just for inspiration I'll try to remeber this classic by Dr Seuss (also cited in Arapiles:Selected Climbs)

Climb with great care and with great tact
And remember that lifes a great balancing act
Always try to be clever and deft
And don't mix your right foot with your left.

(Sorry to all the Dr Seuss purists if that isn't quite correct)


sabu
30-Mar-2005
6:32:23 PM
ahah that acroustic poem is about the best i can do (with my level of thinking when im on the computer) !!

steph
31-Mar-2005
8:43:23 AM
Here's a gem for your collection:

Gutter Rat of the Pines, oh for sure
Little Mac will remind of his greatness
Sabu and he, post smut constantly
WhilST mods shake their heads in disdainment.

Chockstoners alike talk smut day and night
of their passion for altitude sport
We differ in methods, in opinions and ethics
And the morals of climbing we're taught.

Chippers like rhinkle chip holes in the rock
Replacing the natural beauty
With gym replications of holds-------what a crock!
Personally i reckon they're fruity.

Aiders alike haul all up the wall
If all else fails -- grab a draw!
Is it a sport? not like climbing its naught
This is an art of much more.

Chalk junkies use, chalk junkies abuse
Tannin's become 'Join the dots.'
If all else fails reach behind---chalk avails!
Don't be worried, I'm sure you've got lots!

But like most of us here, we all climb with no fear
I take off my hat to you all.
For we differ a lot, but on rock we're all hot
And would give anything for a good cold beer...

rhinckle
31-Mar-2005
9:18:55 AM
On 31/03/2005 steph wrote:
>Chippers like rhinkle chip holes in the rock
>Replacing the natural beauty
>With gym replications of holds-------what a crock!
>Personally i reckon they're fruity.

chippers like rhinckle!!!!!!!
i am mortally offended.


in gara gorge i have bolted one climb
last pitch of 'flight of the bumbly',
and admit to some brushing of igneous rock,
when its lichenous or crumbly.

chipping is right i believe for potatoes
to do it on rock is something that sucks
when cleaning up granite i've removed a few flakes
the easy becoming the crux




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There are 76 messages in this topic.

 

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