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General Climbing Discussion

Friday funny anyone.....
3:42:54 PM
Theres an overcrowding problem in heaven. God and St Peter have a meeting to discuss the plausible excuses to enter heaven. All things sorted St Paul resumes hes rightful position outside the Gates.

I few hours later a man arrives at the gates. St Peter explains the overcrowding situation and ask him for is excuse.

His reply was;

I had just finished one of the most gruelling days at work and decided to have a work out on my balcony. As Im lifting the weights over my head, I lose my balance and fall over the railing. As Im falling I manage to catch the railing under my place and start to try to scramble back in. Though this man comes out and starts hitting my fingers with a hammer. I lose my grip and fall 49 stories. Im lucky enough to have the bushes below to break my fall. As Im trying to get up, I see this fridge coming for me. Hits me and now Im here.

Well, Im impressed. Your on your way in said St Peter.

A few hours later, a second man arrives. St Peter explains the situation.

The man replies with;

I had a suspicion that my wife was having an affair. I arrive home early and to my surprise there was a man, hanging from the railing. I pick up a hammer and belted at his fingers. When he fell I saw that the bushes below broke his fall and decided to pick up the fridge and send that over to finish off the job. As soon as I did this I suffered a massive heart attack and died right there.

Well! That is one of the best ones Ive heard all day. Okay you can go in said St Peter.

A few hours later a third man arrives. Again St Peter explains the situation.

The man replies with,

Please, if you can picture this, Im siting in a fridge. Naked!


Gerry Adams (the Sinn Fin Political Party Leader) arrives at the Gates and St Peter greats him.

St Peter: Name please.

Gerry Adams: Gerry Adams

St Peter looks at his list and turn around saying, I dont see you here!

Gerry Adams, Dats okay, Im here to give you 10 minutes to get out

11:54:59 AM
im doing my best to resist.....

2:18:02 PM
Here's one that my maths lecturer told me... It's probably been posted before, but what the hell:

Q: What do you get if you cross a climber with a mosquito?
A: Nothing - a climber is a scalar, and a mosquito is a vector.

[Chockstone Moderator edit:
I have locked this duplicate thread. Please use the original found here; ]

There are 3 messages in this topic.


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